


That Shampoo Bottle Kid

by orphan_account



Category: South Park
Genre: M/M, Masturbation, Object Insertion, chunky kyle, hes in the shower, its a shampoo bottle duh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-06
Updated: 2014-02-06
Packaged: 2018-01-11 03:31:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1168147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the end, he's actually pretty disappointed in himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	That Shampoo Bottle Kid

since i can't post links in the notes for some i reason i would just like to say that [this](http://www.sks-bottle.com/images/0069-08LRG.jpg) was my inspiration and reference for this fic ok bye

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Arguing with Stan is probably one of the most stressful things Kyle ever has to do. Now they do it often. Stan is always ground to the bone, his life at home is shit and Kyle wishes he could help for the rest of his life, coddle Stan or wrap him up in some lying care, get him love & affection, but Kyle’s got his own life & his own life does not qualify as Stan. 

Throwing his bedroom door closed when he get’s home & muttering under his breath for his mom to piss off when she calls out not to slam things doesn't help the situation out either. He sits on the edge of his bed & kicks off his boots so they can fly halfway across the room. He throws off all of his clothes and grimaces when he realizes how gross the room is. So Kyle picks it all up, at least tosses it into his hamper and grabs a dirty towel out from his closet. He wraps it around himself, almost up to his ribs. Hides his fat stomach from himself & tries to imagine that it’s not there.

It’s not like he has an issue with it, he would just prefer to think he’s not some chunky, curly fucking red haired, Jew kid - because well it’d be nice not to be. At least the chunky part, so when he passes by the mirror in the bathroom he makes sure not to look into it when he takes his towel off & puts in on rim of the sink. 

Kyle turns on the water & sits on the cold toilet seat, naked, waits for the bathroom to at least steam up before he gets in. He poke’s at a scab on his knee, thinks about how he hate’s getting rug burns and how he probably shouldn't have been wrestling Stan around in his room with just a Tee on and a pair of briefs. 

Stan had grabbed him pretty hard by the shoulders when he thinks about it. The muscles over his collar bone are sore from where Stan dug his thumbs into the dip there so he could throw Kyle down onto the floor. He skinned his knee pretty hard when he tried to push back on Stan’s force. His whole leg sliding and the joint under his left knee getting most of the friction. He bled and Stan almost hurried himself into an asthma attack, saying he was just messing around, didn't mean to ever hurt him. Kyle pushes him away when he starts acting like a bitch & asks him if he could just get him a band-aid or something. Stan nods, opens his bedroom door as quietly as he can & paces out slowly, because it is almost four o’clock in the morning. He doesn't close the door behind him so Kyle sits there, feeling sort of uncomfortable as he holds on to the sides of his messed up knee. Stan doesn't come back with a band-aid, he does come back with a small bottle of liquid bandage, disinfectant & a cotton ball. Kyle groans when he sees it all in his hands, “ You’re ridiculous dude.”

Kyle snaps out of it & realizes that he’s been dozing out a bit longer than he needed to when he can feel the hot steam running into his lungs. He sits up and steps into the tub, feels his freezing feet burn when it touches hot water. He flicks the curtain closed completely & positions the shower head so he can lean up against the wall & still have the water hit him. He could fall asleep like this, has before & he just massages the muscles around his neck. Kyle is sure it’ll bruise eventually, it’s started to turn a yellow-green & his mom will eventually be asking him why in his right mind he thought it would be okay to come home with hickeys.   
Kyle groans, get’s his hands off of his shoulders & uses them instead to grab onto the wall as he sinks down to the bottom of the tub. He sits and leans up against the porcelain edge that connects to the wall. Kyle brings his knees up to himself and picks at the layer of liquid bandage that’s still on the scabbed one. He lets it run under the hot water until it’s loose enough to peel off. He tears up the gross skin looking thing so it can run down the tub’s drain easily. 

Last night was shit, from skinning half of his knee off to telling Stan he’d rather go home than be here for the rest of the night. The worst is seeing Stan’s placid, un-eased face that shows up while they can both hear Randy & Sharon yell at each other through a couple walls. He tries not to think about it now, while he’s alone & naked because it all ends up with Kyle accidentally grazing the whole backside of his hand up against Stan’s morning wood in a sleepy haze. When it actually happened Kyle’s whole body practically flinched & he flicked his hand against his chest like he had touched a boiling kettle.His eyes are wide open in a second and he sit up before Stan can wake up. He barely touched him, it’s ridiculous, but here Kyle is. Trying not to look at his dick that’s waken up for the day. 

He’s maybe gotten off to Stan a few times. Maybe since he’d seen him use the gym shower for the first time ever & how he had practically pressed himself up against the wall to hide from everyone else in the musky tiled room. Alright, Kyle’s jerked off more than he thinks he has to Stan. He tries not to think about how he doesn't really mind about the idea of actually doing it right now. Feels like maybe he shouldn't, just because he’s still pretty pissed at Stan. Though it seems like Kyle gives up before he can decide whether it would be a bad idea or not because he’s grabbing his dick already & kneading over the whole head with his thumb. 

Kyle huffs, thinks about the shape of Stan’s dick through his boxers that he got a look at this morning. He thinks about it getting up to his own cock, just touching it while they both kiss. Kyle thinks about what Stan’s dick actually looks like. Wonders if he’s cut like him or not, probably. Then again he’s never asked. Never even thought about asking until now. Maybe he will, maybe he will when he’s not pissed off at Stan anymore.

Kyle spreads his folded legs, uses his other hand to rub at his perineum while he jerks off. See’s if that’ll be enough or if he’ll actually use his fingers again this time. He groans when he looks down at himself and catches his stomach folding over, tells himself not to get soft & keeps thinking about Stan. He barely feels anything as he rubs at the soft skin under his balls. Kyle lifts his hand up to his mouth & shoves his fingers into his mouth, he accidentally gags once but benefits from it as his body reacts to it & creates more saliva. Spit pools up in his mouth & he pulls his fingers out. Uses whatever other spit that left over in his mouth over his dick & moves away from the stream of water so nothing washes away. Kyle looks ridiculous as he scoots over with one hand on his dick and the other balled up so it stayed soaked in spit. He leans back again once he’s situated. He continues to tug at himself, touches around the crown when he shifts his ass up & pushes one wet finger to himself. He’s loose enough for there to be an easy give for his index & thinks about his own finger being Stan’s thicker ones. He doesn't push it all the way in, pokes it in and pulls out. Switches to his middle finger & quickly puts that one inside of himself. He’s stopped touching his dick, concentrates on wanting to spread himself out. 

Kyle moves his middle finger around, circles it enough until he can move in his ring finger next to the first. He curls them both inside of himself & scissors them around a couple times. He grabs his cock again & keeps fingering himself until he can get his pinky in. His breath hitches & he pushes them all in deep enough to push at his prostate. He grips his jaw & grabs the base of his dick. Massages it there so he doesn't cum. Kyle sloppily moves his fingers around. Notes that the sting of not using some sort of proper lube is probably the one thing that’s turning him on the most. 

He’s been fingering himself long enough now that he starts to look around, tries to see if there's anything small enough in the shower as some sort of dildo. He hits the back of his head against the tiles when he sees that there’s only two large bottles of mom’s L'Oreal hair wash, Ike’s Axe wash & dad’s small bottle of three-in-one. It suddenly hits him & he remembers that they still have that travel bottle somewhere under the sink. He pulls his fingers out of himself & sits up quickly, almost slips and he grips onto the shower curtain. He sighs & pushes it away so he can step out. Kyle soaks the floor in his footprints but he doesn't care. He ducks down to under the sink & opens the cabinet. He pulls out a still packed make-up bag with toiletries & digs down to the bottom for the purple bottle that seems to be half filled with shampoo when he flicks the cap open to smell it. He closes it & pats back over to the tub. 

He steps in carefully & closes the curtain again. He sits back down in the tub immediately & spits all over his fingers. He drops the bottle by accident & it clangs loudly. Kyle cringes but works to put three fingers back into himself again. He grabs the bottle with his other hand & puts it in his mouth. Tries to cover it in saliva as he fingers himself. He’s jumpy and excited, knows it’ll fit inside of him. He pulls his fingers away when he can stretch them out & open without a dull pain. His leg lifts up & he sets it onto the edge of the tub, moves his other legs so his hips are twisted & he can reach his hand behind himself to get the bottle inside. 

Kyle reaches down & uses the hand that was knuckle deep in his ass to keep his cheeks spread. He puts the wet base of the bottle up against his puffy hole & when it doesn't easy slide in he get’s one finger under the rim & starts to push it in like that. Once the tip pops in he takes his finger away. He takes a deep breath that ends up shaking his his rib cage before he slowly spins the bottle & pushes it in. It’s halfway in when he realizes he didn't get it wet enough & he’ll definitely be sore afterwards. 

“Fuck it--”, he tugs his dick off a couple times & pushes it the rest of the way, right under where it curves to the cap. 

He shuts his mouth tight & whines. Moans when he pulls it out & feels it spark up over his prostate. Kyle breaths hard as he begins to fuck himself with it. Slow at first then starts jerking it quickly. Feels the thick liquid inside of it slosh around. He tells himself to cum like this, without touching his dick completely. Then realizes that would only work if he thought about Stan. 

“Stan, god--”, then it’s his cock inside of him, not some plastic bottle, “--Stan, jesus.”

He can imagine the head of his cock clipping at his tight muscles, wonders if Stan would touch his dick for him or would get off on watching Kyle do it himself. Kyle moans again, hisses when pre-cum dribbles all over his cock. 

“Sta--, oh fuck. “, he makes quick motions, pushes over his prostate over and over. Tells himself Stan would do that for him if he asked. He pushes his balled up fist into his mouth & moans hard. He’s crying now & he cums, shuts his eyes hard & feels it all hit onto his stomach. Kyle swallows, pushes his wet hair back from his forehead & reaches down to pull the bottle out. He holds back a groan as he feels it pop out. He lays it on the bottom of the tub. Under the water, let’s the poor bottle wash off. He feels pretty bad for the bottle, wonders what it ever did to deserve that. He feels loose & his back hurts now. Kyle simply gets up shakily & washes off his stomach under the water. Picks the bottle up & sets it on the soap rack. Doesn't think anyone will be suspicious of the new bottle in the shower. Rinses off quickly, scrubs in all his gross crevices & turns off the water, lukewarm now from being in the shower for so long.

Kyle get’s out, grabs his towel from the sink & dries himself off. He scrubs at his face with the towel & runs it over his hair. He laughs, wonders if he’ll ever be able to tell Stan about the whole incident before he wraps his towel around himself and scurries off to his room.


End file.
